I am starting this blog today partly because I got the idea from the Sherlock BBC series, but also because I feel the need to chronicle whats going on in my life right now and typing is easier that writing at the moment. I’ve been in the hospital for 63 days today. Can you believe that? That’s 9x longer than any other time in my life. And I’m unsure of when I get to leave for rehab. I guess this blog is to help me get out of my head and onto some paper, maybe that will help, we’ll see.

I had a heart and lung transplant on July 19th after cardiac arresting on the 4th, and then once again sometime after. I’ve heard people say, “the hard part is over, now it’s just recovery,” but is the hard part really over? I can’t walk still, I can only use the bathroom with help, and I’m pretty much bed ridden. I am beyond thankful for my new organs, but this latter half is turning out the be a real bitch and a half. Everyone tries to be encouraging and talks about ” little by little,” and ” baby steps” but I just want my life back at this point. The one thing I never wanted to be is a ” patient” but that’s all I’ve been fro the last 63 days and I’m doing my best to cope. Sometimes it takes a lot of energy just to cope through the day, but everyone expects a positive attitude and all. When positive things start to happen, like rehab and things feeling like their culminating to discharge, not just another day, I’ll get more positive, but who knows when that will be.